I’ve Got a Little List

10 May

As some day it may happen that a victim must be found,
I’ve got a little list–I’ve got a little list
Of society offenders who might well be underground,
And who never would be missed–who never would be missed!
There’s the loathsome politicians who just borrow, tax, and spend —
Chris Collins telling Poloncarz the pettiness must end–
The three men in a room who run New York into the ground–
And all those useless Senators who never make a sound-
And the voters who sent Silver back, I really must insist–
They’d none of ’em be missed–they’d none of ’em be missed!

CHORUS. He’s got ’em on the list–he’s got ’em on the list;
And they’ll none of ’em be missed–they’ll none of ’em be missed.

There’s fifteen teabag parties, seems like every other day,
And Free New York’s blacklist–I’ve got that on the list!
The authority appointees with their patronage and pay,
They never would be missed–they never would be missed!
The Lady walking Elmwood, who’s completely dressed in white,
And the Mayor touting progress although half the town is blight,
Or the Billionaire from Rochester who throws his cash around,
And the Common Tern, which caused the Peace Bridge plan to run aground,
And that tedious, repetitive newspaper columnist–
I don’t think he’d be missed–I’m sure he’d not he missed!

CHORUS. He’s got him on the list–he’s got him on the list;
And I don’t think he’ll be missed–I’m sure he’ll not be missed!

And annoying website authors who think cars are all to blame,
Self-righteous bicyclists–I’ve got them on the list!
And people who think hot dog stands will be our claim to fame–
They’d none of ’em be missed–they’d none of ’em be missed.
There’s Casey, Pigeon, all those guys who always want to fight,
And all the other hacks who seldom care ’bout what is right,
And Buffalo Republicans, a very lonely lot–
Might someday run a candidate who almost has a shot.
But it really doesn’t matter whom you put upon the list,
For they’d none of ’em be missed–they’d none of ’em be

CHORUS. You may put ’em on the list–you may put ’em on the list;
And they’ll none of ’em be missed–they’ll none of ’em be missed!

(With apologies to Gilbert & Sullivan, and Seth MacFarlane).

5 Responses to “I’ve Got a Little List”

  1. Michael Powers May 10, 2009 at 9:00 pm #

    “everything is better with a bag o weed”

  2. Mike Walsh May 10, 2009 at 11:47 pm #

    I’m now convinced that you must have consumed numerous chemical substances in your youth.

  3. Pete at BS May 11, 2009 at 9:08 am #

    Funny stuff, Pundit. Well done.

  4. Terry May 11, 2009 at 10:39 am #

    Why the lady in white on Elmwood?

  5. pegger May 12, 2009 at 2:16 am #

    Which columnist is the most tedious?

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